Hello. This is Virgil, 8-Track TeckHead's colleague. As you may be aware, TeckHead and the rest of the "Chaingun Island Crew" have taken a vacation to Geneva-On-The-Lake, leaving me in charge of operations for the next week. I have produced Issue 25 for your reading pleasure. Expect to see copies appearing at Spiral Groove Records in Milford and Arcade Legacy in Sharonville as well as the Internet Archive. Unfortunately, there is no purely-digital copy available, for I have illustrated (almost) every graphic my hand. I apologize for the inconvenience.

Additionally, TeckHead urged me to promote the Chaingun Island Mailorder. if you are interested in purchasing official Chaingun Island merchandise, you are able to do so.

-Virgil

Ahhh, first day-a bein’ a BUSINESS-BORG! It’s been… REALLY FRIGGIN’ STRESSFUL! I’ve been gettin’ e-Mails ALL DAY from folks buyin’ up my WAREZ! The stress! The PRESSURE! It’s WEARIN’ on ‘ol TeckHead! But wait! I got CASH now! Direct deposit, baby! I think I’ll have me a ‘lil vacation with my SHMOKIN’-HOT wife ‘n my stalwart skull-buddy… to GENEVA-ON-THE-LAKE! Me ‘n Cassetta went last year ‘round this time… but we couldn’t do a whole lot ‘cuz, y’know, no DOSH! Eyup… OH SNAP! I totally forgot to write this month’s ISSUE! OH WAIT! I didn’t HAVE TO WORRY aboot that; y’wanna know why? ‘Cuz in this month’s issue, everything’s comin’ up VIRGIL! It took a while to COAX him into writin’ an issue, but the dude’s a real SPECIMEN! I LUV his BRAIN! Speakin’-a-which, his issue comes out TOMORROW! Anywho, I gotta go pack. We’re gonna hail a TAXI with all this newfound DOUGH ‘n take ‘er REALLLLL E-Z! See ya later!

Speakin' a which... GO CHECK OUT THE MAILORDER! GIT YERSELF A T-SHIRT!

My fellow ECLECT-oids, it finally happened. After a few months-a HARDCORE DELIBERATIN’, workin’ with AGENTS, ‘n all SORTS-A BIZ-TACULAR oil-burnin’...they’re FINALLY here. CHAINGUN ISLAND T-SHIRTS!!! What’re ya waitin’ for?! GO NUTS!!!

Hey HEY, ECLECT-oids! 8-Track TeckHead back with YET ANOTHER issue-a the CHAINGUN ISLAND ZINE! This one catalogs my conundrum with the convoluted concept-a ANNIVERSARIES, since Chaingun Island just turned TWO earlier this month! Anywho, like always, you can git yer PAWS on it at Spiral Groove Records 'n Arcade Legacy as well as the INTERNET ARCHIVE!

I hope yer X-CITED for next month! 'Cuz my buddy VIRGIL'll be TAKIN' OVER!

No more Anniversaries anymore! No more Anniversaries anymore!

Well, ECLECT-oids… it’s July 8th. You know what THAT means. It is TECHNICALLY the 2nd Anniversary-a the CHAINGUN ISLAND ZINE. I’ve been doin’a TON-A thinkin’ aboot that… I’m just a touch on-the-fence aboot it all… if ya wanna know more, then CHECK OUT MY NEW YOUTUBE VID!

GOOOOOD MORNIN’, ECLECT-oids! Welp, Odbal’s all GAKK’D-OUT on that OLD-TIME RELIGION today! Why, you ask? Well, today’s “X-Day”, accordin’ to that NUTTY ‘ol bone! Odbal’s been talkin’ aboot this fella, one J.R. Bob Dobbs. Says that he’s the prophet-a the “Church of the Subgenius”. I read the pamphlet Odbal somehow obtained ‘n I gotta admit… it was ENTICIN’! Ya see, in order to receive ETERNAL SALVATION, ya gotta SLACK OFF! Believe me, ‘ol TeckHead could use a vacation day! I’m still a touch on-the-fence aboot JOININ’, they want me to give 45 DOLLARS to become an ORDAINED MINISTER! I ain’t got that kinda DOUGH! ANYWHO! Odbal was so HOPPED-UP, that he told me to SPREAD THE WORD! Apparently he filmed a ‘lil gimcrakey at Virgil’s house EARLY in the mornin’ while I… eh, I can’t remember what I was doin’. I wondered HOW I could spread the word, ‘n then I remembered somethin’! I’ve been hearin’ aboot this thing called YOUTUBE! So I thought, “Ah, what the hell?” ‘n made me a CHANNEL! GIT YER EYES ON IT HERE!

Hey Hey, ECLECT-oids! MAN! It's been a HOT MINUTE since the last issue-a the CHAINGUN ISLAND ZINE! Me 'n the CHAINGUN ISLAND CREW were ULTRA-BUSY this month DEVOLVIN'! Yup, this issue is entirely DEVO-themed! It's to commem-o-rate the DEVO concert that happened in Cincinnati on the 24th! If you were there, you may or may not've gotten a PRE-RELEASE ISSUE! If you were one-a those folks... here's the FULL MONTY! For those who didn't sneak-a-peak... DON'T PANIC! Ya can snag yer copies at Spiral Groove Records in Milford 'n Arcade Legacy in Sharonville along with the INTERNET ARCHIVE!

...OH! I almost forgot! You can also now DOWNLOAD my NEW(ish) SINGLE, "Rattlesnake", on BANDCAMP! Hi-def! Extra fixin's! Better LATE than NEVER!

Duty now for the future 'n Keep It ECLECTIC!

Well ECLECT-oids, after a 'lil legal dispute with Newgrounds 'n a bout-a PROCRASTINATION, Rattlesnake is now available for listenin' 'n downloadin' on the NEWGROUNDS AUDIO PORTAL! GO GIVE 'ER A LISTEN!

Konnichiwa, ECLECT-oids! 8-Track TeckHead here to REGAIL you fellas aboot me 'n my SMOKIN' HOT wife's trip to JAPAN! Well... I ain't gonna REGAIL ya HERE! I'll do it in the ZINE! Eyup! ZINE-mas came EARLY this month! I was just CHOMPIN' at the bit, wantin' to get this JAWN out! As per uge, you can get yer fixin's at Spiral Groove Records, Arcade Legacy, 'n the INTERNET ARCHIVE! I hope ya N-joy 'n... COLLECT 'EM ALL! GANBARE! Keep it ECLECTIC!

Oh! One more thing... GO LISTEN TO MY NEW SINGLE! RATTLESNAKE! RATTLESNAKE! RATTLESNAKE! RATTLESNAKE!

HELLLLOOOOO ECLECT-oids! 'Memba when I cut a 'lil demo of a tune called "Rattlesnake" last year? Well... NOW ITS OFFICIAL! My first O-FICIALLY-PRODUCED single is OUT NOW everywhere ON-LINE (especially on the AUDIO PORTAL)! Produced by Hane Kaiser with Nickel Plate Road as my backin' band, yer not gonna wanna pass this JAWN up! 

Thanks again for bein' the SICKEST bunch-a ECLECT-oids this side-a Cincinnati! I hope ya N-JOY!

Soory for the late postin'! been runnin' around all DAY promotin' this JAWN!